Wednesday, June 22, 2011

life with autism

Autism- or - as "they" call it officially now- Autism Spectrum Disorder (same thing) it is not a shameful thing. it's different than some people, but not WRONG.

The first dr we saw when Malachi was diagnosed was kind of an asshole.
I was totally keeping it together and I asked him as calmly as could be " if this was YOUR son, what would you do?"
he looked at me and said " first..I would cry."

part of me gets it- deal with the emotional response. yes. I understand. But the other part of me is thinking- CRY??!! cry? that is your response? because it's a horrible diagnosis?? My son doesn't have cancer! he has autism! it's a learning style not a death sentence! fuck off!

But we go through all sorts of emotions over and over don't we?
it's a constant thing . one day you accept it and you move on and sometimes weeks go by and you don't even think about autism.
other times you barely survive 5 minutes at a time and all you can think about is the autism and how it's affecting your life and the lives of the other family members. and you have days when you are happy and embrace who your child is, and you have days when you DO want to cry. and that's ok too.
what it comes down to is just simply- no parent wants their child to struggle or have pain. on ANY level. EVER.
it's not any different for a parent of a child with autism than it is for any other parent. It's only that parents of kids who are dealing with something that is obvious and in your face- think about it a little more often.

when is the world just going to get to the point where we can accept that not only do some people not fit the " norm" but NO ONE DOES. there IS no normal.

lets just love each other for our differences . can't we?
give more understanding
give more patience
give more love


  1. oh my neener. i mean, i really don't know how you deal with it--not the autism, but other people's responses to it. i'd be kicking nuts left and right.
    that being said, i think you're pretty amazing. i mean, you just thinking of and accepting autism the way you do is the first step!!! you open eyes!
    just keep swimming, just keep swimming, *hums*

  2. yup we can/ought to love our differences. you are super uber awesome! mali is one of a kind. i see this post and wander past my bookcase as his painting hangs beside it.....i'm honored!!! cuss all ya like lady! <3