Monday, June 27, 2011

bee's knees and elbows in wasp's nests

the woman in the blue car in front of me decided to brush her hair. it must have been quite a mess because she need BOTH hands for the job. I watch as one hand held a clump and the other tried to brush through it. the ENTIRE way down Johnson street. stop & go lights...over the bridge..all the while both hands off the steering wheel attending to what seems to be the most snarled head of hair that ever was. How does one's hair even get that matted? did she just get off a motorcycle? lose a bubble gum blowing contest - in the wind?
I continue to follow her all the way down johnson and then all the way down park ave. The entire time..both hands in her hair, eyes in the rear view mirror.
I don't know whether to be horrified or impressed. that lady has some talented knees.

I never understand how people can drive with their knees. I have never even considered trying to master that. I guess I just don't really feel motivated to work on a skill that could possibly end up killing me in the process.
it's like people who can ride a bike with no hands.just riding along without using the handlebars? why? obviously you're trying to show off. get a unicycle hot stuff!
I could never do it. I'd jack-knife that bike faster than you can say " elbow cast" .
of course I've never been that good at riding bikes anyway. I didn't learn until the 3rd grade. it was such a huge source of humiliation and shame for me. I remember being at a friend's house and trying to make up excuses for why we shouldn't ride bikes...
I still don't feel comfortable on one. There are too many cars around! where am I supposed to ride? what are the rules about turning? who invented those torturous seats?

it's a wonder anyone gets anywhere at all.

1 comment:

  1. i have tried the driving with the knees a few times, just to see if i could do it. i don't get it. i mean, my feet can't even properly operate the pedals with my knees up into the steering wheel.
    plus, it's stupid.